Let’s take a look at what’s going on below the public eye at American colleges. We mean stuff under the surface. Underground stuff.

No, we’re not talking about scandals that colleges hushed up. We’re talking about stuff that’s literally covered up, literally buried. When you go to colleges and dig up dirt (again, literally), you may unleash the secrets of…

5The Millennia-Old Mounds

What would you say is the oldest human-made structure on Earth? The Pyramids of Giza are a decent guess, since they were thousands of years old when the Coliseum went up. Other structures, like the pillars in Göbekli Tepe in Turkey, are thousands of years older still. Over in Louisiana are a series of mounds that were made by some unidentified ancient people even before the pyramids went up. The oldest estimates say they contain cremated remains from 11,000 years ago, which would probably make the mounds the oldest remaining structures made by any humans, period.

Even if those wildest estimates aren’t accurate, these mounds are spectacularly old. They are not, however, some remote archaeological site. They are a part of the campus of Louisiana State University, and are formally known as the LSU Campus Mounds. “They were here long before LSU existed,” says the college, in a bold example of understatement. And if you’re wondering what the school has done with this bit of land, well, mostly, it was known for tailgate parties. It’s been a great spot for hanging around on game day, and this partying left some wear and tear on the mounds, making them slide and split.

In 2010, LSU finally put an end to the destructive festivities. They cordoned off the mounds, and they’ve been working ever since on a more permanent plan to preserve the site. This wasn’t a hugely popular decision among veteran partiers, who figured that if the mounds lasted so many millennia, they can probably shrug off seven days a year of kids and alums playing drunken tag on them. The dispute will ultimately be settled by a battle between the boys of Delta Kappa Epsilon and the no-fun Dean, and this will feature a bulldozer, a parade and someone catching fire.

4The Ancient Tunnels

In the 19th century, Ohio State University buildings didn’t have what you’d call central heating. Instead, the various buildings linked up through a network of steam tunnels. These stretched out for four miles at first and then grew to twice that. Open the wrong door in some academic building, and you might stumble into these tunnels even today.

So, are these some convenient route from one building to another? Not exactly. The tunnels aren’t lit. Get lost down there, and maybe no one will find you because current maps don’t track all the tunnels’ twists. Summer’s an especially dangerous time to go spelunking. The temperature down there hits 160 degrees, you can’t touch a handrail without gloves, and professional crews can’t last more than 10 minutes. You shouldn’t venture there unless you’re the university’s official technical director of utilities. And if you are the university’s official technical director of utilities, well, then you go down for an inspection one night, a water pipe bursts, the brick floor dissolves, and you get sucked into a hole and fully submerged.

Naturally, students are forbidden from entering, outside of a sanctioned tour once a year. One time, a group of four were caught in the tunnels taking pictures and drinking beer. Police initially suspected they were planning some heist (seriously), but when they realized the kids were just having fun, they went easy on them. The penalty was only 30 days in jail.

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